I'm a sucker for a good horoscope.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): First the negatives: Don’t be a martyr to what you’ve won. Don’t let your success oppress you. Don’t become a slave to the useful role you’ve earned. Don’t neglect your own needs as you serve the needs of those who admire you for what you give. Now let’s try a more positive way to frame the challenges ahead of you: Keep questioning whether the fruits of your victories are still enjoyable and fulfilling to you. Make sure the triumphs of the past don’t get in the way of the potential triumphs of the future. Find out how your success may need to evolve. Push beyond what’s good and head in the direction of what’s great.

My goodness am I a sucker for a good horoscope, what an eery feeling to have something or someone outside of you communicate and put into words things that you have been grasping for and feeling, but may have set aside as illegitimate sensations. Not that I would have ever referred to myself in terms of being a "martyr," or admired, or possibly a servant to others (pride and vanity are worlds apart). I must admit that the sudden influx of activity and attention that the collective, and I, have been receiving, makes me feel a little outside of myself. Basically, I'm not use to it, it's new, and I feel like it's some what of a social role that I don't know if I properly fit. I've always been the type to question everything, I'm a bit of a pessimist, and prefer a realistic route (due to the fact that I have already tried living a fantastical, assumptive life, and it was a lesson learned). I think I can say that I never intended to be classified as an "artist," without the statement being detrimental. So, that's it. This is all very new to me, and more than anything, it's surreal. It's almost as if I'm on the outside looking in.

To have been covered by The Current on multiple occasions, by WOAI and San Antonio Living, The SouthSide Reporter (three times), The Prensa, The Express News (comes out in tomorrow's paper), BackBeat Magazine, 2 Cammy awards, a residency in LA, a gallery show that has been intentionally prolonged....in a month, at times makes me want to run for cover and hide (because I don't know what to say) but at the same time I am ecstatic, because this is all much bigger than me. There is no grasping for notoriety on my end because I have not lost my purpose, which is to give back to the community that has supported and given me so much, and to make my family proud.

Everything has happened so fast that I have had little time to sit, soak it up, analyze, and put it into perspective.

I've been given good advice, bad advice, and questionable advice. My favorite conversation to recall is "It's a business, that's how you have to see it." Really? Interesting, because that's what I wanted to stay away from. But, I think I can navigate appropriately, and I'm sure an argument can be built against that statement.

I don't mean to sound ungrateful, because it's actually quite the opposite. I am so grateful that I am more determined than ever to stay true to myself, to the community I love, and to direct my energy towards a constructive, positive life.

Thank you.

p.s. I recently got asked to be a part of a show at the Museo Alameda. I'm gonna be showing at a museum. What???

(the Museo space, and my wall)